I just want a break!

     It has been 12 weeks since I found out he lied and cheated. It has been 8 weeks since I became fed up with his wishy washy I love you's and told him I was done. However, he is still here. Every morning I wake up and see him in the kitchen making coffee. Every evening he is here, his face a constant in my day.
     I just want a break. It is complicated! He came with me to a friends house to help me move in and he just never left; he has been living here with the boys and I the whole time. He wasn't invited to stay. I was invited, given an opportunity to get away from him. Yet, that night, as he prepared to sleep in our car, I said " just stay here tonight." I felt so bad that the father of my children would be sleeping in our car. I allowed the overwhelming guilt I felt for having a place to stay, take over.  I did not think he would stay for 3.5 months!
     I am realizing how unhealthy the whole situation is. I am wondering why I always feel responsible for him, why I always make excuses for him. He had been unemployed for two years. Then when he finally took a job, after I gave him an ultimatum, he chose one far below his skill set. He turned down a high paying job with benefits to make $12 an hour. Matt rarely took action on his own. I was the mothering type and frequently swooped in to get the job done. I can remember several difficult moments in our relationship where his procrastination and lack of action took a toll on our family. With the big one being his refusal to find a job after being laid off. It wasn't the bad economy or the lack of openings. He never applied to a single job! He hung out at home, skateboarded, juggled, rode his bike, and spent time with us. All fun, until the money ran out.
     It has been 12 weeks since I came to understand that he no longer cared.